Islam has allowed the believer if he can justice to all, he is permissible to marry two, three, or four at a time. Islam has set the optional boundaries on which the person can take up the decision to marry on his choices. But make sure to treat all wives equally. If he isn’t able to perform their responsibilities, rights, and wishes. Then you can go in loss.
In Holy Quran Chapter 4 surah Nisa verse No. 3 Allah almighty has stated that:
“If you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly with the orphans, marry women of your choices: two, or three, or four. But if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly then only one. “
Here in this verse, Allah is defined as a man who can keep a maximum of four wives at one time. But in case he can bear her load like wishes, requirements, gifts, wealth, and expenses properly. Islam emphasizes equal rights for all wives he married. It is not a command but an optional way that a person can choose according to his capacity.
Advantages of being a second wife in Islam?
Now let’s discuss the healthy benefits of 2nd marriage and what Islam says to Muslims for dealing with second wives. Now it is obvious from Surah Nisa verse no. 3 To deal with all wives equally means you must possess all the characteristics to run two families. Although Islam has various reasons to emphasize getting married to three or four women at one time. But there are also benefits for women and men both and their children in their upbringing.
Marriage is the sunnah
The first advantage of being a second wife is that this is the righteous way to follow the sunnah that in return you can bestow with bundles of blessings and Ajar.
In Quran Allah Says: And indeed we sent a messenger before you (O Muhammad SAW) and made for them wives and offsprings”. (Ar-Ra’d 13:38).
Away From Gunnah or sinful act
Marriage is the lawful intercourse act that ensures modesty, chastity, and protection which is a need in social life. Marriage is the way to satisfy sexual needs and beware of sinful acts.
According to the Hadess stated that :
O, Young People! Whoever among you can marry, should marry.”
Al-Mumin 23:5: And those who guard their chastity (i.e private parts from illegal sexual acts).
Always seek refuge, forgiveness, and mercy from Allah and follow the right path of virtue in our lives.
Satisfaction and Mercy
Through marriage, the couple can feel a sense of contentment and get Allah’s mercy in regard.
In Quran Ar-Rum 30:21 Allah Says “and he has put between you affection and mercy”.
One day we all have to move to Allah, that’s why we should fulfill our responsibilities properly which can reward us in Akhirah.
Disadvantages of Being a Second Wife in Islam
Although there are not any big disadvantages for a wife. Because marriage is a key to protection, security, and self-satisfaction that Allah has commanded. The second woman or wife always faces the feeling of insecurity in relation to the first wife being alive.
The disadvantage of being a second wife
Sense of insecurity
The second wife will face insecurity toward her husband which will take her in a severe sense of doubts and auspiciousness.
Second place image
The only disadvantage that comes forth, is that society never accepts the second wife and always set her in second place. She feels that she is the consolation prize or the second-hand thing that has no value or is worthless.
Higher Divorce rate
The only thing that hit the second marriage is that typically it is observed that 60 percent of the marriages ended up asking for the same requirements expected from the first wife. So the great challenge is there for the second wife to never fall into the criteria that her man wants to. Resultantly, the divorce rate is much higher in a second marriage. That’s why this thing is very scary for the second wife.
The second wife is more judgmental
The second woman is more judgmental than the first wife.
Tag of second marriage/ seriousness/ maturity
Always get into the reality-is the meaning of a second-time marriage. The person who is involved becomes more serious with life. Worries, tensions, and stress of first marriage might get them down already. So that is the big threat for being a second wife to not successfully take the marriage.
Relationship issues while having both wives together
The second wife always feels the second stage or feels like she is not getting attention and her kids as the first one. It is a big difficulty in dealing with a second marriage. According to one hadith:
“Hazrat Asma R.A narrated: the one woman came to Hazrat Muhammad SAW and said her husband has a second wife, and if she shows something that she doesn’t have to her second wife. On that our beloved Prophet Hazrat Muhammad SAW replied the person who describes the things that he/she doesn’t have is like those who wear two lying clothes”
Concerning this Hadees it shows in Islam the perspective of the second wife is like the first wife started to show things to her for sake of hurt, jealousy, insult, or like that. Therefore, the second wife will never feel the place like the first woman.
Conclusion:
Islam emphasizes getting marriage with one, three, or four wives at a time. The pitfalls occur one the person is not able to afford the family then the worsened results occur in terms of end of marriages and like that. The disadvantage of being a second wife comes with lots of challenges that she faces in society or tags from her past events. On the other hand, Islam is guiding us to marry with our own choice of women to stay away from sinful acts and get the mercy of Allah in return.
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